Christmas Crafts: Peppermint Stripe Soap

Don't run away. You can do this.

Get back here! You can SO DO THIS. It will cost you about $20, take two evenings tops, and in the end you will have awesome homemade gifts to give to teachers, babysitters, friends and aunts.

I know, you have two questions: when do I have time? (I won't answer that) and how do I come up with these things? (I will answer that!) This particular idea came from The Binder. It holds all the cool ideas I find in mags like Martha Stewart Living and Real Simple, most of which I'll never end up doing, but it's nice to know they're there. 

One of the things I've actually done is this peppermint stripe soap. Panda gave them as teacher gifts one year, and this year it's Redman's turn to make them.

The materials are readily available at any craft store: head toward the section for candlemaking, the soap stuff is usually right next door. You will need:

  • A pack of white glycerine soap
  • A pack of clear glycerine soap
  • Peppermint soap fragrance OR peppermint essential oil. Essential oil you will probably need to get at a health food store, but may be worth the extra trip for you because its fragrance is superior to the synthetic soap stuff.
  • Red and white soap coloring. Red food coloring also works. The white is NOT necessary, it's just that the red layers tend to bleed into the white ones, so I like to give the white a little boost.
  • 2 cheap microwave safe measuring cups
  • 2 mini-loaf pans
  • Popsicle sticks or wooden skewers for stirring
  • A spray bottle filled with rubbing alcohol

You will need 1/4 cup glycerine for each layer of soap. The glycerine usually comes pre-scored and through trial-and-error we found that 3 squares = 1/4 cup.

Cut 3 squares of white glycerine into smaller pieces, place in measuring cup and microwave at 20 second intervals until completely melted.

Add about 20 drops of synthetic fragrance to melted glycerine and stir. If using essential oil, add 5 drops at a time until you get the level of scent you want. Remember every white layer will have fragrance added so less is more.

Pour white soap slowly into one loaf pan—the slow pour avoids bubbles. Cut off another 3 squares of white, repeat process to fill other loaf pan. Let pans sit about 15 minutes to set.

Take a fork and score the surface of the white layer, lengthwise and crossways. Pick out all the little scraps of white, then spray the scored surface with rubbing alcohol. This process helps the layers adhere. 

Cut off 3 squares of clear glycerine and melt in microwave. Add red food coloring and stir until it's the shade you want. Pour slowly on top of white layer in one loaf pan. Melt another 3 squares, color, stir and pour into other pan.

Again, let sit for at least 20 minutes. Before adding the next white layer, score with a fork, tap out the shreds and spray with alcohol.

And so repeat, alternating red and white until the pan is filled. Let sit for at least 4 hours, preferably overnight, in a cool place.

The soap will release easily from the pan if you put it in the freezer for 20 minutes. Hold the pan upside down, pull away the sides, press on the bottom with your thumbs, it should come right out. If it doesn't, I don't know you, this conversation never happened.

Let the soaps come back to room temperature. With a sharp knife, cut the soap into slices, slide into cellophane bags. Martha says to tie with bakery string but I don't know where you procure that. Just tie with whatever you have, make some kind of label and be sure to tout the fact that this is a HANDMADE GIFT.

Store soaps in a cool, dry place until ready to bequeath to someone you love.

You rock. How do you think of these things?

Christmas Crafts: Felt Tree Garland

I really do try to keep the Christmas Crafting in check, otherwise I end up with more doodads than I have places to put them. But this year we're moving some Christmas to the TV room downstairs, which goes hand-in-hand with a massive hauling out of old toys and junk, and surgery on our chimney so that maybe, finally, we can build a fire in the fireplace without filling the house with smoke. And suddenly there is a mantelpiece in need of its own little bit of holiday decor. Weird how that happens.

I found this tutorial at Noodlehead.com for a really adorable garland of felt trees that requires not much more than brown and green felt, and scrap holiday material. It doesn't even have to be holiday-themed. She used Liberty prints which were perfectly adorable.

This was a 2.5-evening project over the holiday weekend: Friday evening I cut out all the trees (you need 2 pieces of felt and one piece of fabric for each). Saturday evening I sewed and stuffed. Sunday afternoon I put it together. And I love it.

You can make the garland, or make each tree into a hanging or standing ornament. These are super easy, a great project for first-time sewers of all ages, and the garland looks nice anywhere you hang it.

Punkin'

It's nearing the end of October. Commence holiday crafting!! (Like we need an excuse)

I got these fabric pumpkins out of an issue of Martha Stewart Living, many moons ago, and I love love love them. Once you make one, you can make a lot, and they are very conducive to "assembly line" tactics.

Everything you need to make these is probably already in your house, with one sole exception being a piece of specialized equipment called an embroidery needle. A LONG embroidery needle. You can do without it but when it comes time to wrap the pumpkin and shape the "ribs", a long embroidery needle can't be beat.

You will need:

  • Fun, autumnal fabric of any kind, color, texture, pattern.  Oranges and yellows are lovely but don't be afraid to experiment
  • Green and/or brown felt for the stem
  • Thread in all colors
  • Stuffing
  • Sewing and/or embroidery needles

(By the way, if you're wondering about my lurid orange-and-black nails, it's because I'd worked the school harvest fair that day, at the "Monster Manicure" booth)

Cut your rectangles.  The basic rule of thumb is that the rectangle should be twice as long as it is high. If the height is taller, it will be a tall pumpkin. If the length is longer, you will have a squatter, flatter pumpkin. Whatever size you cut, sew one short seam together. It's good to assembly line this because the rest of the project is hand sewing. You can sew a bunch of seams and then put the machine away.

With a regular sewing needle and thread, do a running stitch along one long side, about 1/4" from the edge. Pull the thread to gather the edges tight and then do some whip-stitches across the puckers to hold it in place. Turn the pumpkin right side out and stuff generously. Do another running stitch 1/4" from the top edge. Pull tight, get all the stuffing in there, and again, whip stitch across to keep everything tight.

Now you have your stuffed pumpkin.

Thread an embroidery needle with a generous amount, maybe two arm lengths. Do a few whip-stitches on the bottom side of the pumpkin to secure the thread—if you merely knot off the end it will pull right through the fabric.

Push the needle through the center bottom of the pumpkin, straight up through the top. Wrap the thread around the side—you can follow the wrinkles in the fabric that are already occurring as a guide, and then push the needle in through the bottom again. Up through the top, and pull tight, making the thread sink into the stuffing. Wrap around the side, in through the bottom, up top and pull tight. Repeat until the pumpkin looks the way you want it to. Whip-stitch and knot off like crazy at one end of the pumpkin.

For the stem, I start with a rectangle of felt about 2" x 3". I fold it in half lengthwise and then hold it up to the pumpkin to visualize how much I want to cut off. Cut a sort of rounded triangle, so it looks like a stained glass window when unfolded:

With scissors, round off the bottom corners of the stem. Thread a needle with green thread, hold the stem edges together, and start blanket-stitching down to close the seam. Sew to about 1/2" of the bottom and stuff lightly, leaving the 1/2" of bottom stem free. This unstuffed part gets spread out on the top of the pumpkin, hiding all your sloppy whip-stitchery, and you blanket-stitch around it, securing it to the top of the pumpkin.

Smoosh up the pumpkin, twist and fiddle with the stem until it looks the way you want it to. Awesome. These are so much fun. Quick, easy-to-make, and unlike those infernal paper ornaments, these are totally non-addicting. There is no need to make thirty of them. But you could. And I did.

Bernie speaks: The Longest Day

October 17th fifty-seven years ago was without doubt the longest day of my life until then, and probably the longest day of my entire life.  For on October 17, 1955, I awoke at an hour that was not just unusual for me, but absolutely, positively unbelievable: 6:00 A.M.  Truly, there was nothing in this world (well, maybe one thing) that could get me out of bed at that ungodly hour when I was 22 years old.  But on that brisk October morning so long ago, I had an appointment at 8 o’clock which by law I had to keep.  It was an appointment at the Armed Forces Induction Center at 17 Whitehall Street in New York City.  I had been inducted – “drafted” was the more preferred word – into the United States Army, which for the next 2 years, 1 month and 10 days would become my home, my employer, my guardian and my omnipresent monitor. Surprisingly, my father was more frightened and upset than my usually hysterical mother over their son’s impending departure into the unknown of military service, a service that since 1941 had become mandatory for all of the able-bodied and mentally competent young men of the United States of America.   At a physical exam a couple of years previous to that 17th day of October, the military established determined that I was both able-bodied and mentally competent to serve my country.  Not only that, but at a physical exam to be held later during The Longest Day, the United States Army’s doctors determined that despite all of my 130 lbs. distributed evenly in a 6-foot bony frame, I was so physically fit that I would qualify for the so-called “Queen of Battle”: the infantry (a qualification that was to be implemented several months later).

I packed a small bag of toiletries and a few pair of underwear, and about seven o’clock I said good-bye to a quasi-tearful mother and walked, however reluctantly with my father to the subway station at 174th Street and the Grand Concourse.  He had insisted upon accompanying me at least to the point (50th Street-Rockefeller Center) where he would get off the train and go to his office.  I could not imagine why he was so frightened.  Certainly there was no war – the Korean War had ended almost two years before – and there was no discernible danger of his son lying in some foxhole with artillery shells falling all around him.  The only danger (especially if one was a Republican, which my father was) would be from a nuclear bomb set off by what was then known as the Soviet Union (today, of course, Russia).    When the train arrived at 50th Street, he did not get off.  He insisted upon riding with me all the way to Whitehall Street, something that I quickly made clear I did not want.  But he could not be persuaded.  He walked with me until the building into which I would soon disappear came into sight.  I was not a very happy camper over this display of mother hen smothering, and finally had to assert myself and tell him that this was as far as he could go.  He sheepishly acquiesced and we said an unemotional good-bye.

The induction center was a beehive of activity: well over 100 young men (some discernibly unhappy and/or frightened) being herded like cattle through physical exams, immunization shots and interviews with psychiatrists.  Some two or perhaps three hours later, the cattle-herding and the filling out of at least one ton of papers ended save for one more herding maneuver into room that was meant to hold no more than 50 people.  It was there that we all raised our right hands and swore to uphold the Constitution (just like presidents do) and serve our country faithfully…”so help us God”.   I was now a bona-fide member of the “greatest fighting force the world has ever seen” (screw you, Julius Caesar) of the “greatest nation in the world” (screw you too, Soviet Union).  And when I walked out the door of 17 Whitehall Street that morning with my newly-minted fellow fighting men, I had something that I didn’t have when I walked through those doors:  a number, a number that would be etched, branded into my brain for a lifetime: US 51 360 938.  And as I would quickly learn, the prefix “US” was a true badge of honor, for it denoted that the holder of the number was a draftee, not a volunteer.  Volunteers or enlistees carried the prefix “RA” before their numbers.  But I would also learn soon that those with the “US” prefix were held in contempt by training sergeants, a fact which depending on circumstances could lead to a bit of discomfort for those of us who had shown hesitancy to serve our country.

Following our mass swearing of allegiance, we were lined up in orderly military fashion and escorted by a couple of sergeants to four waiting buses, which would transport us to a place called Fort Dix in the absolutely flat terrain of central New Jersey.  Upon arrival at this sprawling military reservation, we were brought to an area of warehouses, storage depots and old barracks called the “Reception Station”.  And it was here that we would all lose the last vestiges of our soft, decadent civilian lives.  We were broken up into distinct groups of 50 and those groups were in typical military fashion given numbers.  My group was number 3-17-1. 

The cattle-herding resumed.  We were first herded to our barracks, told to leave our few personal belongings there, and then herded to an enormous warehouse, where the very first item we were given was a big heavy-cloth bag, called in Army nomenclature, “Bag, Duffle, OG, 1 ea.” (OG was an Army acronym for olive green).  That bag would in the next hour or two be filled with all sorts and manner of clothing and miscellaneous articles, so much so that it would end up weighing not an ounce less than 50 lbs.  There were two pair of boots, five pair of socks to go with the boots, two pair of low quarter shoes along with 3 pair of socks to be worn with those shoes; there were four pair of fatigue uniforms, two pair of  winter OD (olive drab) dress uniforms, two pair of summer khaki uniforms, two caps for the fatigue uniform, a “flying saucer” cap for the winter dress uniform and a soft cap also for the dress uniform (the latter cap being formerly known as the “overseas cap”, but called in Army argot by a vulgate term for a particular part of the female anatomy), one “flying saucer” cap for the summer khaki uniform along with one soft cap for the summer uniform, one large winter dress overcoat – which alone weighed about 5 lbs –, one winter field jacket with winter liner, miscellaneous belts, ties and accessories and even underwear.  The Army, at least according to rumor, the lifeblood of the organization, wanted its soldiers to wear its underwear.  Each and every article that was given to us required our signatures and our new service numbers.

From the monster warehouse we were herded with our 50-lb. duffle bags to the barracks, where we were told to remove our civilian clothes and don our brand-new shining fatigue uniforms and brand-new and very stiff boots.  We were instructed that we had four days within which to return all of our civilian clothes whence they had cometh, or alternatively dispose of them in the appropriate “can, trash, 1 ea.”.  The only civilian vestiges we were allowed were our toiletries and our wrist watches.  From now on, our world would be olive drab or olive green.  No exceptions.

The remainder of The Longest Day was devoted to orientation, endless orientation, with time out for nourishment in one of the most venerable institutions of the military establishment: the Mess Hall.   Breakfast, lunch and dinner were terms unknown in military parlance.  There was only one term for all three: “Chow”.  The orientation sessions, which continued well into the evening, covered subjects literally from A to Z, and whatever we might have learned in our civilian lives now had to be unlearned, because there was only one viewpoint that now mattered: the Army viewpoint.  One of the more lengthy orientation sessions – one that lasted close to two hours – was about law, Army law, called the Uniform Code of Military Justice.  It was a session clearly designed to put not the fear of God into you, but rather the fear of the Army into you.  One sub-topic of law that was given special attention was that of “absence without official leave”, better known as AWOL.

AWOL was a crime for which the Army would show no mercy.  It was made perfectly and crystal clear that if a soldier “went over the hill” (notwithstanding the fact that there were no hills in this part of New Jersey), he would be hunted and hounded by the United States Government, particularly the FBI, until caught, dragged back to the military post from which he deserted, court-martialed, dishonorably discharged and hauled away to spend the rest of his life in the Army Disciplinary Barracks at Fort Leavenworth, Kansas.   That’s where he would grow old, die and be buried in a common grave outside the walls of that fort.

“Does everyone understand that?”, asked the lecturing officer.

“Yes, sir”, came the response.

“I can’t hear you”, the lecturing officer said.

YES, SIR”, in perfect unison came the 100 dB response.

The Longest Day finally ended at 10:00 PM, or in Army time 2200 hours, on October 17, 1955.   “All illumination in the barracks WILL now be extinguished”.  The only thoughts that entered my head as The Longest Day ended were that it was going to be a very long two years before my OD and OG world would end.  Little could I imagine as I sat there on my barracks bunk that after those two years, I would go on to another two more years of active reserve duty and then 17 years of National Guard duty, and end up with two duffle bags of benefits, which in turn would qualify me for one of the highest classes of membership in Mr. Romney’s exclusive 47% Moochers Club and/or in Mr. Ryan’s exclusive 30% “Takers’ Club”.    Yes, I recall with vivid clarity The Longest Day of 57 years ago, and in remembrance and celebration thereof, I can now say,

FOOOOOOOR-WARD …. MOOCH !!!

Stories from a Jewelry Box

It's all about stories. More and more, Jeeps and I are finding this out. Him in his business and me with this blog. "I like to cook, here's what I made for dinner." But so what? Any fool can google a recipe, I'm not inventing anything new here. 

"I really don't even try many of your recipes because I'm vegan," said my friend Rachel. "So I tend to like your personal posts more than your foodie ones." 

She's right: it's not the food, it's the story. Life is a series of moments, a collection of stories. I have been reading Adam Gopnik's The Table Come First and was struck by this paragraph, penned in an imaginary email to the food author Elizabeth Pennell:

"In your beautiful book, though, you offered both the method and the object.  The method, which you invented, of turning every recipe into a little story, a bit of narrative, shows that recipes need not be neat tables of chemical interactions but short stories of mixed emotions: what I did that day, and why I did it."

What I did that day, and why I did it.

Yesterday was Panda's birthday.  My baby is twelve. Her big present was one of those bead/charm bracelets that are all the rage these days. I went with the poor-girl's Pandora from Kohl's but still a very nice jewelry investment for a young lady and one she can keep adding to. My mother sighed at it.  "Just like the charm bracelet that I had. My parents would buy me new ones for my birthday or Christmas."

May I show you my mother's charm bracelet?

Isn't it wonderful? This lived in the bottom drawer of her jewelry case, and I would go visit it regularly. It was, and is, just the most awesomest thing ever. All the charms work, that is to say, the Hope Chest opens, the spinning wheel spins, you can turn the handle on the coffee grinder, and raise the lid of the piano. This bracelet is a little girls' dream. When I became the mother of a daughter, it was bequeathed to me, to live in my own jewelry box, and be visited.

This got me thinking of a conversation I had with someone recently, about the things a woman keeps in her jewelry box. Jewelry, obviously, each piece of which can carry with it a story of acquisition or occasion or symbolism. But in addition to the baubles, most women have, in the bottom drawer or the secret compartment or a velvet drawstring bag, other treasured swag. Silly things. Sentimental things. Private things. Bittersweet things.

So I thought I'd invite you into my jewelry box. It's three stackable levels, and it's the bottom compartment that has the stories. Or the insanity, depending on how you look at it.

(Opens it up) OK. Whoa. I'm vulnerable. OK. Here we go:

OK, so let's start out easy at 9:00.  Those are the earrings I wore on my wedding day, and clipped to the cardboard thingie is a Blessed Mary medallion Frank gave me for "something blue." I wore it pinned inside my bra. Because that's what you do.

Peeking out from under the earrings are my father's dog tags. I went through a phase in college when I wore them all the time. Now I just keep them in here. Jeeps has his dad's tags and always wears them when he flies. On business trips or when we're flying to Florida, the kids always ask, "Dad, do you have Grandpa's tag?"

At high noon... Well that needs no explanation does it? The ol' EPT sticks. Who doesn't keep and treasure that bit of pee? And yes there are three, and yes I have two children.  If you're a woman who knows, then you know, and if you know, then reach out and hold my hand.

(Holds your hand)

OK, now, we have 2 of the 65 bobby pins that were stuck in my hair on my wedding day. We have a paper clip that I took from the desk of a very dear co-worker when he left Verizon, because we'd worked together for 8 years, we were tight, we were partners and I felt like I just needed to have something out of his desk to keep. This is the bottom drawer, OK? It gets weird!

Then, in a little clear bag, we have a gold pendant with a pearl that my very first boyfriend in high school gave me. Then there's a man's collar stay. I'm gonna skip over that. Long story.  And then there's that little drawstring bag, which contains a very sweet, slightly sad, but ultimately triumphant story: 

Once upon a time in my early twenties, there was a boy I loved. And he gave me a ring. A little gold ring with two entwined hearts. Our hearts were entwined, and probably always will be on a certain level, but ultimately, it all fell apart. Quite badly. We left each other, but I kept the ring, because that's what you do, and I put it away in the bottom drawer of my jewelry box.

Time went on, and new jewelry boxes were bought, and the ring just transferred along with the other souvenirs of my life. I got married, and one day I had a young daughter who would go "visit" the treasures in my jewelry box. She'd play with my mother's charm bracelet, try on the necklaces. And this little girl took a shine to that little gold ring. One day, she tried it on, walked out of my bedroom, and, as these things happen, the ring was lost, somewhere in the expanse of the living room floor, unbeknownst to the mother.

The unknowing mother came along with her evil vacuum cleaner and heard a terrible noise. The ring was retrieved from the depths of the machinery, but it had been defeated. Squashed. The mother was sad, and tried to bend the ring back into shape, and the squashed ring broke into pieces. The mother was very sad then, but she put the pieces into a little bag, and put the bag back in her jewelry box, because that's what you do. Things fall apart, but some pieces are worth keeping.

Fairly recently, the boy, who is now a man (and a lovely one), got back in touch with me. I told him what became of his ring, the ring he gave that girl. 

"First of all," he said when I was finished, "that's the greatest story ever.  Second of all, you kept it? All these years? You...kept me?"

"Of course," I said. "That's what a jewelry box is for."

"What do you mean?"

"Every woman has a secret treasure or two in her jewelry box.  It's where she keeps her swag. Her stories. Funny, I keep meaning to write a blog post about that."

"You should write it now," he said. 

So I did. 

Love isn't perfect. Sometimes treasures are lost, squashed, or they break in pieces, but you keep the pieces because they belong to your life. The boy and girl had fallen apart badly, but twenty years later, the man and woman discovered that each had kept the pieces worth keeping, and from those pieces, something new could be built.

This is what I did today, and why I did it.

Crawling to the Ruins: a Love Story

It’s my wedding anniversary week. I tend to treat it as a week-long event because we had a destination wedding to Sedona, Arizona, that took up the better part of a week. Family and friends arrived anywhere from 1-2 days prior to the actual day, September 26th (also my dad's birthday, so we joked that it was a destination birthday party with a complimentary wedding thrown in) and some stayed in Sedona a couple days after as well. 

It sounds odd to have friends around on your honeymoon but I liked it very much. I don’t do well with sudden disconnection after intense connection. It would have been a jolt to the emotional system if everyone had left all at once. It was a gradual tapering off, an extended good-bye, and by the time we were alone at the end, we were ready to be alone.

So we tied the knot on Saturday, and by Tuesday it was me, Jeeps and my girlfriends K and E (two of the Famous Five). We were staying at the Enchantment resort, they were at their bed & breakfast, and we just met up whenever and wherever (without cell phones!). 

We had a blast. We went to Flagstaff Observatory one night, and then spent another day hiking one of our favorite trails in Sedona—a rugged canyon rim loop to some amazing Anasazi ruins and cliff dwellings. We really didn't give K and E much of a choice in the matter, insisting that this hike was something not to be missed, they were going to have their minds blown. And they were game: lead on newlyweds, we follow, blow our minds.

We saddled up with water and provisions (and possibly some other stuff but more about that later) and through the scrub we went, into more heavily wooded trails...

And we finally emerged onto the trail that wound around the canyon rim. You can see in the picture below that there are some dwellings down in the canyon, but the ones up above the rim are more easily accessible and so they were our destination.

Getting up to those dwellings is not death-defying, but it’s something of a vertical scramble and honestly, it’s hairy. The first time Jeeps and I climbed up we were properly freaked out. But once up there, the view is breathtaking, and the notion that you are sitting in what was essentially someone's house, and you feel all that history, and all that magnificence, and, subsequently, all that loss, it's humbling.

So we set out. Or up, rather. Jeeps had made it up to the top, I was nearly there, and K and E were about midway. And while negotiating my hands-and-knees route up the rocks, I looked back down to my right and saw that E had frozen.

Frozen.

“I can’t do this,” she said shakily. The sun was high overhead and I could see my fair-skinned friend growing redder in the heat. “I gotta get down. I can’t get down.  I…” She was stuck there, afraid to ascend further, not sure how to get down. And about to panic.

“It’s OK,” I called to her.

“It’s OK,” echoed K, “Just stay still, take a breather.”

“Jeeps!” I called but he was already scrabbling down, moving past me like a sure-footed crab.

“You're OK,” he said, "It's all right." He reached into his hip pack and got his water bottle. “Take a drink. Here, put my hat on, get some shade on your face.  It’s gonna be OK.” 

E drank, took a couple of breaths. I could see she was tearing up, keeping one white-knuckled grip on the rock ledge and clutching the water with the other.

A few minutes of hydrating, cooling and calming-down passed. “You can do this,” Jeeps said.  “Take my hand.  Ready?  You can do this.” And holding her hand, he started her up the incline again. Coaching where to put her hands and feet. Coaxing. Encouraging. Giving a leg up. Getting her to laugh at the fear.  Getting her to laugh at herself.  K and I brought up the rear, cheering her on, and finally we were all safely in the niche in the cliff wall.

We stood around gasping, passing the water, looking down the ledge and laughing with the slightly hysteric euphoria of overcoming a physical and mental challenge. Jeeps gave E a big hug.  “You did great!” he cried.

“Wow,” she exclaimed, “I didn’t think I was gonna make it…” She was red in the face again, but her eyes burned with accomplishment.

“Of course you were,” Jeeps said, his arm around her. “You were awesome.”

My own eyes were burning with a possessive pride. That's my husband, I thought to myself, and as if reading my mind, K jostled my side and grinned at me. "You made a good match, dear."

"He gets me through shit like this all the time," I said to E.

And it's true: up every canyon wall I've had to climb, Jeeps has been there. He's a good coach if I need him to be; he can help me map out a safe route. But more importantly, he knows that I usually need to figure out my own way, and he really just needs to tell me to take a deep breath, give me a drink of water, and tell me it's going to be all right, and tell me: you can do this.

Anasazi hike 2
Anasazi hike 2

We stayed up in the cave niche for an hour, enjoying the view and company, and...OK, maybe there was something else going on that may have led to an improvisational jam session on some native American instruments we just happened to have in our backpacks. I'm vague on the details now and anyway it's wandering off topic...

Yeah, I know. Anyway!! We stayed up there a while and then we helped each other down, went swimming and then probably went out to dinner.

This was our honeymoon.

This is my husband.

The husband of my days...

The friend of my life...

The father of my children...

and the partner on my path.

Concerning Gingerbread

I have a few favorite books that I faithfully read every year, usually in the fall: Rumer Godden's In This House of Brede; Elizabeth Ehrlich's Miriam's Kitchen; and Laurie Colwin's twin masterpieces, Home Cooking and More Home Cooking.

I was in bed with the latter two this weekend (I love writing that), dreaming of comforting things to eat now that the tiniest bit of chill is in the evening air, and now that I am a touch more inclined to make dessert. Like gingerbread.

Says Colwin:

The sad fact is that gingerbread is on the decline, although it is alive and well in the children's books of the fifties, where cheerful housewives wait at home for the arrival of their hungry children at three o'clock, ready with a great big pan of warm gingerbread and some ice-cold milk.

You do not need to be a housebound mother to make gingerbread. All you need is to put aside an hour or so to mix up the batter and bake it, and then, provided you do not have a huge mob waiting to devour the gingerbread immediately, it will pay you back for a few days because it gets better as it ages. I myself never have any around long enough to age, but my English cookbooks assure me that a few days make all the difference.

Colwin then offers her personal thoughts on gingerbread, namely that the more ginger the better, and molasses should never be used because it is too bitter. She prefers pure cane syrup and endorses that made by the C. S. Steen Syrup Mill. Of course her books were written in 1992 and she helpfully offers the reader the address and phone number of said company. Ten years later, you simply can go to their website if you wish to order syrup. Colwin also advocates Lyle's Golden Syrup which is available in most grocery stores and I myself have some in the cupboard but only because I've made this gingerbread before.

Colwin gives two gingerbread recipes in More Home Cooking, and I go with the one from Delia Smith's Book of Cakes, which is called "Damp Gingerbread." I could call it "Moist Gingerbread" and watch the majority of my girlfriends go screaming from the room. But I won't. However I will give you my own little tweaks and modifications as we get down to business and get to perfuming your kitchen.

Moi—... Damp Gingerbread

  • 9 tbsp butter (that's one stick plus one tablespoon from a second stick)
  • 12 oz Lyle's Golden Syrup (that's 1 1/2 cups and a little bit annoying because Lyle's comes in an 11 oz bottle. I use 1 cup of the golden syrup and scant 1/2 cup of Grandma's molasses, and do so without a trace of bitterness)
  • 2 cups plus 2 tbsp flour
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1 3/4 tsp baking soda
  • 1 tbsp ground ginger (can be a level spoon or a heaping spoon, depending on your taste)
  • 3/4 tsp ground cloves
  • 1/4 tsp cinnamon
  • 1 egg
  • 1 cup milk
  • 1 heaping tablespoon fresh ginger (and stop me if you've heard this before, but if you are a ginger person, Spice World's bottled pressed ginger could and should be one of your very best friends, and see funny story at the end of the post)

Preheat oven to 350. Grease a baking dish with butter or spray with Pam.

Melt butter, golden syrup and molasses in a saucepan and set aside

Sift flour, salt, baking soda, and spices into a mixing bowl and set aside

In a separate small bowl, whisk egg, milk and pressed ginger

Pour syrup and butter onto dry ingredients and mix well. Add egg-milk-ginger mixture and mix well. The batter will be very liquid: this is damp gingerbread.

Pour into baking pan and bake for 50-55 minutes until the middle is just set with the edges pulling away from the sides of the dish.  Your kitchen is going to smell amazing and don't be surprised if you feel inclined to string up some lights and create a holiday station on Pandora. At the very least you should light a candle.

Cool for ten minutes before turning out.

Serve with a dollop of whipped cream, vanilla ice cream, or just eat it straight out of the pan. Try to save some, wrapped in foil, because it really does improve with age.

*Funny story about bottled ginger: I was in Stop & Shop yesterday, trawling the produce section where I know they keep those jars of ginger. They are usually on the lower shelves beneath the bins, cozied up with the bags of apple chips and the jars of minced garlic and the bags of pine nuts. But they weren't there. I scoured every last lower shelf and then went over to the ethnic aisle, thinking maybe they'd moved in with the Asian ingredients. No, not there either.  

I checked the produce section one more time and then finally asked a clerk. He wrinkled his eyebrows, asked if I didn't mean ginger root? No, I said, it was bottled fresh ginger. He asked another clerk. Clerk2 said yes, the bottled stuff, he knew what I meant but he hadn't seen it stocked lately. Had I tried the ethnic aisle? Yes I had.

Clerk2 apologized, as did Clerk1, and I thanked them both and moved on. As I was passing the refrigerated display of bagged lettuce and other salad stuff, AH-HAH!!! There they were! Hiding!  

"Hey!" I called out happily to Clerk1 and Clerk2, holding up my prize, "Found it!"  

And they just seemed really happy about it, and apologized again for not knowing their own section. They were cute. It's these little things that make your day.

Un Petit Livre

From May to September I move my laptop upstairs to the dining room table. This is because the dining room has the best view of the yard, and with all the work I put into my gardens every spring and summer, I want to be able to see them. My office downstairs has no windows. So I work upstairs and make a mess of one end of the table, and then every fall, right around this time, I move back downstairs, get reacquainted with my desk and all my craft supplies and get itching to make something. 

Today I made a book:

Isn't it cute? I made it during my lunchtime, it took like 10 minutes. I have no idea what to do with it, so I'm letting Panda take it to school tomorrow to see what her friends think.

I got the tutorial off How About Orange which is one of my very very favorite blogs. Jessica has no end of clip-arts and crafts and free downloads and projects. If you have a love of paper (I'm looking at you, Kelly) I highly suggest going to check her out. She actually got this little book tutorial off Paper Kawaii, another awesome site for paper crafts. That tutorial goes step-by-step with pictures so I'm not going to transcribe all the instructions here. I'll just give you my illustrated version of events.

You make one too. You can do it. And then tell me what you'll do with it because I still have no idea.

Warfare Ratatouille

'Tis the time of the season: everywhere farmers' markets are showing off their squash, eggplant, peppers and tomatoes.  So what does that mean? Why ratatouille, of course.  Ironic because it's a peasant dish, stick-to-the ribs food, and evokes cold winter nights. But screw it: the time is now, the produce is at its peak, you can serve it cold, and DAMMIT THIS RECIPE IS INSANE!!!!!!!!!!!! My friend Bridget found it on Epicurious and sent it to me. The author, Francis Lam, coined it "Weapons-Grade Ratatouille" and rightly so. You can win a war with this dish. My friend Becky challenged me to make it the way Remy does in Disney's Ratatouille. If only I had that kind of patience, not to mention a mandoline. So this is going to be vegetable mess style. And I've decided that the next party I throw is going to be one giant pot of this ratatouille, a couple giant rosemary focaccias, and big bottles of wine. To be consumed while standing around in the kitchen. I cannot wait.

Transcribing the recipe as it was written, with my modifications in italics

Weapons-Grade Ratatouille

The point of this recipe isn't to follow it slavishly. If you want more of this, got less of that, go for it. The only thing I insist you do is block off some time on your calendar and hang out with your vegetables for an afternoon—the low, slow cooking is what makes it knock your momma's bonnet off.

Makes nearly half a gallon, of very intensely flavored stuff

  • 3 shallots and 1 large onion, minced (I didn't have shallots so I used 1 medium yellow onion, 1 medium red onion, and 4 big cloves of garlic, all minced)
  • ½ cup of extra-virgin olive oil. Yes, that much. Summertime is living it up time.
  • A couple more glugs of olive oil. Hell, just keep the bottle handy. (I love Francis)
  • Salt and pepper
  • 2 large red peppers, puréed in the food processor (I didn't have peppers but I had an unopened jar of roasted red peppers so I threw that in the food processor)
  • 4 pounds of very good regular field tomatoes, or fancy heirlooms if you're rich. Just make sure they're the kind you eat a piece of ... and then involuntarily eat another piece of a minute later. Oh, and purée them in the food processor too. (I had no fresh tomatoes so I used a can of San Marzano whole tomatoes, drained and thrown in the food processor)
  • 2½ pounds of summer squash and zucchini, ½-inch dice (I don't weigh produce, I just used 2 green zucchini, 1 yellow squash)
  • 1½ pounds of eggplant, diced into ½-inch cubes (A medium-sized eggplant...you know, about...that....big.  Right.)
  • Thyme and basil to taste

Cook shallot and onion (or garlic) in the ½ cup of olive oil over low heat in heavy pot so that they soften and give up their liquid. Stir; don't let them brown, and season lightly with salt and pepper. Cut up your other vegetables while you're doing this.

Once the onion mixture is pale gold and sticky, add the puréed red pepper. Red peppers have a ton of water, let it cook down, stirring to make sure nothing gets too caramelized and burned. Then you'll have a rich, rusty jam.

To said jam add your puréed tomatoes. Bring it to a boil, and turn the heat way down to let that baby snooze off all its liquid. Season lightly with salt and pepper. You're concentrating sugar and tartness, to be umami-oooo-Mommy.

Around this time, heat oven to 450. Toss the zucchini with salt, pepper and olive oil.  Roast hard in one layer on a baking tray. Check after 15 minutes:  when you get nice browning underneath, take the tray out. Cool a bit before putting roasted squash in a big bowl. Repeat with the eggplant. 

(I confess I roasted everything at once)

Keep cooking down your onion-pepper-tomato jam. You'll know it's ready when it gives oil back up. Chop up some thyme and basil and stir it in. Carefully combine the tomato base with the roasted vegetables.

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Stick a spoon into it and feed it to people you love. Then wrap it up tightly and let it sit in the fridge for a day; it'll be even better tomorrow—the flavors meld, the herbs work their way through the whole thing. Just let it come back to room temperature when you serve it to your favorite people, maybe with some cheese and bread, and try not to break too much furniture.

Keeps in fridge 3-4 days and freezes well.

And all right, Becky, here's Remy's version: